Sunday, October 24, 2010

Elementary

Is the name of the theme I'm using on Linux, but that's of no consequence to this post really.

I just went through this awesome mind trip, a trip that took me through the beautiful mind of one of the most beautiful people I know. As I gaze at the squirrel trying to eat the breadcrumbs my neighbour has left him, I'm trying to make something out of it. This huge new chunk in my universe. The squirrel drops the crumb.

You meet these people in life who are so amazing that it takes a long time for you to absorb them and then figure out if it's wise to still hang around. My usual gag reflex is to welcome with open arms, but I'm older and less naive than I once was. Does it come down to jealousy? Maybe my childhood stories aren't so epic, maybe I've never met so many people, maybe my family is dull and conventional. Does it really matter? Does it make me inferior? Why do I have this mad urge telling me that I need to grab a piece of you while you last?

I've made this mistake a lot, bitten off more than I could chew. I need to be cautious. I need to take this slow. Whenever I say something I do the exact opposite, so I guess things won't be taken slow after all.

On an unrelated and mundane note, I hate this attitude about exams that I have. This I-know-all-you-can't-fail-me bullshit is going to get me stuck in a very very sticky hole soon enough. Oh joy.