I'm tired of seeing that monstrosity on the top of my blog

Is it safe to assume that no one reads these anymore? That Kottu has finally moved on to the netherworld. That the old blogger crowd, now probably married and old enough to have multiple grandkids, no longer cares?

Good.

I love being busy, because it keeps the mind occupied, but I recently had quite a long exam season (abridged with Avurudu) and this left some time for thinkingz. Uh oh.

Profundity pundits on social media these days love to throw out phases like "if you love her, let her go know", but maybe sometimes the best course of action is to run away like the wind and let the ambiguity of "what if" keep you comfortable in those long, lonely nights?

Sappy shit, I know. This is why people lost their appetite and the blogosphere died in the first place. Oh well.

ISIS and the modern, westernised girls who flock to it

The premise outlined in the title is all kinds of inexplicable. While trying to grasp the whole wtf aspect of it, this old quote from George Orwell's 1940 review of Mein Kampf stood out:

Also he has grasped the falsity of the hedonistic attitude to life. Nearly all western thought since the last war, certainly all "progressive" thought, has assumed tacitly that human beings desire nothing beyond ease, security and avoidance of pain. [...] Hitler, because in his own joyless mind he feels it with exceptional strength, knows that human beings don’t only want comfort, safety, short working-hours, hygiene, birth-control and, in general, common sense; they also, at least intermittently, want struggle and self-sacrifice [...] Whereas Socialism, and even capitalism in a more grudging way, have said to people "I offer you a good time," Hitler has said to them "I offer you struggle, danger and death," and as a result a whole nation flings itself at his feet.

Clay

The vessel is fragile.

It carries water, the only water you'll ever find. Without the water you cannot survive. No tea, no cooking, nothing doing.

The vessel is fragile.

You've wondered about the nature of the vessel and sometimes mused what would happen if you were to throw it away. You'd never have the guts though.

The vessel is fragile.

One of these days you'll hear a shattering sound and know it's all over. No more grand plans, no tea, no cooking, nothing doing.

People are talking

You know how these things happen when you least expect, right?

You return from a horrible and drawn out campaign of terror to put down that insurgency in the Caucasus to find out that her heart has turned colder than the Siberian winter.

Your first instinct is to call the Okhrana on all your bastard ministers and torture them till they confess. But then you sit down, pour yourself one and listen to some Lorde (because that's what royals are to do nowadays).

When people are talking, people are talking

Let 'em talk

Passion

People always underestimate passion, or maybe it's just me. I take actually being fired up and excited about something for granted. Don't. When that passion leaves you, and you're hit with the searing and searching brightness of sober day, you'll wonder what the hell you're doing here with something you obviously have no love for.

Silence is snuggly

It really is, though.

You know how the best friends are the people with whom you can share long silences and it would be the most comfortable thing in the world?

Or how, in a conversation, you find yourself learning a lot of stuff and letting it all soak in, and you don't want to say anything because you'll add nothing of value to the conversation and "WHOAAA, DUDE" sounds wrong in the modern world of always-assume-sarcasm?

Or that joke about how light travels faster than sound, and some people appear bright before they open their mouths?

Silence is cool, yo. I wish more people were comfortable with it.

Love is a word

This is very crude, I blame it on not writing anything for ages.

Spend a lifetime with me? You know I can't marry you, love.

Not exactly what I meant. You can still experience a lifetime within a few days. Ah, fancy poetry to get me to put out?

Surely there's more to life than what consumerist propaganda has taught us? You sound like Harold now. Maybe there is hope still for marriage.

I'd much rather be grouped with Harold than accept that the pinnacle of human empathy and connection occurs during naked fumbling around. Such a travesty, no?

Don't tell me you haven't seen it with the cats dude! That look they give you... Of grudging but complete trust, the "you'll look after me, right?" eyes. Stoner.

Come on, you must h... Of course I have, asshat. For someone who claims to have fallen in love with me for the braaaaainz, you give me precious little credit. Look at you, appropriating my voice as an outlet for your own little insecurities. And now you're making me rant like an angsty teenager too. Bravo! I hope you feel good about yourself.

Um.

Oasis

This has been lying in an xcf (GIMP) file on my hard-drive with a last modified date of 03/03/2012, but is probably much older. Instead of completing it using GIMP as I must've originally intended, I shifted it to a vector graphic project due to my current love affair with Inkscape, and finished it off in a few hours today.

The original concept was much more ambitious, involving a lot more drawings and stuff, but in the months following the initial draft things happened and this seems more suitable now. :)

Lyrics by Noel Gallagher.

Histeria Colectiva

It's just another day in paradise when everyone gets worked up over *something* again. I mean, really. They say life on this island is chilled out but we need something to be collectively indignant at every now and then right? So I've decided to come up with a helpful list of things people are butthurt about and how to be less butthurt about these things. Yay!

The Sinhala Buddhists

Oh my. You guys are my favourites, maybe because I'm supposed to be one of you? You're 70% of the population, have held power since the "great revolution of 1956", but still have to put up with bad roads, bad education, contaminated medicine, corrupt politicians, and your daughters getting groped on the bus.

Butthurt Claim #1: Nobody Respects Meeeee!

This has been circulating over email recently too. If you ever find out a blog carrying said email, please link in the comments. Email is titled "Sinhalayage Hinamanaya" and is supposed to written by the JHU's Udaya Gammanpila. It is spot on in many regards.

The Sinhalese don't respect their culture, their language or their heritage. No, getting worked up when someone invades your cave temples isn't real respect. Girls think it's cool to speak in broken, accented Sinhala. Say a few words of English and you're the man. Are we really this bankrupt?

See, we used to have a lively, beautiful cultural scene going on. Then the JVP and the Government death mobs colluded to kill and destroy everyone and everything. Sinhala cinema is dead. Our greatest authors and songwriters are dead. Will there ever be another Premakeerthi De Alwis? Highly doubt it. Why?

Butthurt Claim #2: Our Education System Sucks!

Who runs your education system again? Oh right, the most incompetent government ever! Well done.

See, when Ceylon was still a colony, the Brits introduced missionary education to Sri Lanka. To get somewhere in life, and enter for example the prestigious civil service, one had to pass through one of these centres of Christian learning. This left the Sinhalese Buddhists out of good schools and good jobs. A lot of kids entering these institutions were pretty much forced to embrace Christianity.

And then a Buddhist revival of sorts happened. Henry Steel Olcott (the less I speak of his influences on Buddhism, the better) founded a number of Buddhist centres of education: Ananda, Mahinda, Dharmaraja etc. Piriven (institutes for monastic education for monks) such as Vidyodya and Vidyalankara flourished.

Then independence happened, the Sinhalese Buddhists had their people in government, and decided that the government was going to look after these institutions. And we know how that goes, right? Today Vidyodya and Vidyalankara are normal civilian universities and monks often follow normal degree programmes. This has led to a deterioration of the monastic standards of this country. The prestigious Buddhist schools are often battlegrounds between old boys seeking to preserve their status and traditions, and government appointed Principles and other administrative officers trying to enforce their will. Who stands to lose from this other than the Sinhalese Buddhist?

Butthurt Claim #3: We're Losing Our Majority

When half your kids are in Melbourne and don't intend on returning: of course you are. Fix your damn country!

Butthurt Claim #4:  They're RAPING MY DAUGHTER!

From Sinfest

There was a saying in old times that a girl dressed in ornaments and carrying a large gemstone in her hands could walk from one corner of the island to the other in the middle of the night and just arrive at the destination safely.

I mentioned Olcott up there. Look, the importation of puritan Victorian values has fucked up our moral compass. It didn't matter how long a girl's dress was, or even if she was topless.

"Still Not Asking For It"

The birth of a girl was celebrated. Unmarried girls had a share of their parents' inheritance equal to what a boy would get. Women were not property. Women *held* property. What happened?

Butthurt Claim #5: I'm Offended 

From Akon, to Buddha Bar, to tattoos. You guys are indignant at the slightest of things. It's like you're trying to emulate somebod... oh wait.

Look, nobody is obligated to tiptoe around your religious beliefs so as not to offend you. That's NOT how the world works. To quote Rowan Atkinson (widely known here for playing Mr. Bean):

To criticize a person for their race is manifestly irrational and ridiculous, but to criticize their religion, that is a right. That is a freedom. The freedom to criticize ideas, any ideas - even if they are sincerely held beliefs - is one of the fundamental freedoms of society. A law which attempts to say you can criticize and ridicule ideas as long as they are not religious ideas is a very peculiar law indeed.

If the Buddha flipped out every time someone tried to offend him, he would never have gotten around to preaching the Dhamma. Similarly, if you flip out every time someone "offends" your beliefs, you will never have time to practice the Dhamma. If you want to reply, reply with respect and loving kindness. Or just plain ignore it if they're just taunting you. Your actions in self-restraint and kindness speak more for the Dhamma than your words of defence ever will.

Think about it. What's more insulting to Buddhism? A tattoo of the Buddha or this:

Image from here

---

So, I think I'm done here. I could go on and on and on, but Ain't Nobody Got Time For That. Originally planned to cover the Muslims as well, but yeah. No. So for balance I'll finish with a joke:

A Muslim DIDN'T randomly get offended over something. 

There. Pitchforks are in the first room on the left. You can light up your torches in the kitchen. :P

Humano

Logic calls me forth, but biology holds me back.

I've been fascinated by the whole Soylent story. Unverified claims, of course, but if the man is telling the truth, he might've just made one of the biggest breakthroughs for the human race since we decided to come down from the trees and become omnivores.

I have never been a big fan of food. Lunch used to be a chore for me, back in the day. I'd stay at this home-daycare run by an aunty (my mom's friend's friend), and I'd be sitting there with my bath packet from home prodding away for 45 minutes, barely eating anything, until we all realise I'm not making much progress and I proceed to washing my hands (covered in dried indul at this point).

I don't have much to complain about my mortal frame (yet, touch wood!), and I'm happy being underweight, but if this thing can give me a fully balanced diet that makes my skin glow and concentration last for more than 15 seconds, then sign me up! :P

Feliz

I write this while on an old and rusty bus rattling its way across Kottawa's sleepy backwaters on a warm Sunday morning. The slight lump I feel in my throat seems to indicate an impending case of sore throat. This bus is moving at a commendable rate for a 336, or maybe writing this is way more fun than it seems. Bah time, forget about it. Being in a state of time warp-y consciousness a few too many times seems to have permanently altered my body clock.

Graduation was a swift affair. The "kids" were ruthlessly herded into an assembly line to be paraded, awarded and photographed. Men of greatness on the quest seeking maximum efficiency have no time to ponder such trivial things like human dignity.

And of such nature is the adventure that awaits me today. It might sound dead simple to the gullible man, but handing in a robe and collecting a transcript is not a task of O(1) complexity.

(Sorry if none of this makes any sense, by the way)

Edge cases

It's been a surreal couple of weeks, these past few. A few days back it was me trying to make a friend laugh as she was talking to a recruitment agent from Millennium IT (I am known for being a bastard like that). Today, it was me sitting almost alone in the canteen that the gang and I spent most of our first two years of uni at.

Metro is a different creature on weekends. The (four!) lifts are empty, the hallways are deserted, lecturers run about dressed in jeans and t-shirts, and the canteen shop is closed. A few awkward couples sit scattered around the place, sharing bath packets.

I'm in no mood for lunch, so quickly scavenge off the chicken and a few mouthfuls of rice before discarding everything into the bin. I know, I know. Bad. But I just can't. I haven't felt this alone in ages. My okay, yet distant new group-mates are upstairs git-merging a system that has and will never be completed. Our final year project supervisor is scheduled to meet us in fifteen minutes, so I hurry back upstairs.

Happier times at the canteen (pic by Meshak)

So, a year has been spent at Malabe, and I've only managed to visit Metro campus two or three times. Once  tried to unsuccessfully smuggle Himal and Raisa upstairs, but the security guards noticed. Hawkward. Malabe is huge, and free, and people sit for hours under trees happily gossiping and checking out potential mates. Metro is cosy, office-y, and located at the heart of Colombo, a stones throw away from every place you'd ever want to be (Galle Face? MC?). The life students here spend is pretty different to the life students in Malabe spend, and while I'm thankful about everything Metro had to offer, I think I might just like Malabe better. It's a camaraderie thing. Also the library is huge, awesome and has plug-points. :P

Our meeting with the supervisor is progressing with the usual hiccups. Ugly interfaces are berated, inconsistent button styles are pointed out, exceptions that only seem to occur when we show the system to someone pop up all over the face, and threats to fail everyone are made. A voice that sounds a lot like Miss A's (refer link at the beginning of the post) seems to waft in from an adjacent computer lab. Attempts made to locate her post-meeting are unsuccessful.

So, in a week, the lectures for this semester will end. And then a few more weeks will see the end of our final  examinations, and the conclusion of our degree programme. The last time I faced a life-changing event like this, I didn't even have this blog. It's been a while, and I do hope I've outgrown my panic attack days. :P

random post #62

Let's go back to one of the oldest tricks in my book of what to do when I have nothing to write about.

So, I'm going back to uni next week. Baller girl will be there, balling away. Here's a sketch of her that I drew one boring evening at the library:

And here's a story of how things will not work out between us:

"Fifty rupees. It'll make you feel better." said she. Reluctantly handing over the money, he went and sat by the window. The table hadn't been cleaned after its previous occupants had left. He had barely started playing with the straw (from a half-finished bottle of Pepsi) and the ketchup on the plate when she joined him, ice cream cone in hand. "But I have a cold!" he protested.

I found this in the drafts folder. Must've written it one one of those bad days when I was frustrated with everything. And just when you think of how she means nothing to you, and how you're sooooo over her, you see her sitting there at uni; her long hair waving in the breeze, her perfect pearl-white skin glowing in the morning sunlight, and her arms crossed like the total tomboy (yet elegant girl) that she is, and you're left doing this:

Things left unsaid

I haven't even touched this thing in ages, have I? I miss the days when I could write something stupid and get a million comments. I miss being anonymous, being able to speak your mind, you know? There are so many things I want to shout out about, so many things that the blogosphere circa 2009 would've been able to help me with. Everything was so much better back then, and I'm not just saying that for nostalgia's sake. We were family, even though scattered around the world and never having met.

Getting back to the present, I've been done with the first semester of my last year for about 3 weeks now. The batch is all back home, de-stressing. Some of us (a tiny fraction, really) even went on a pretty awesome hike, more on that in another post. :)

By the way, I'm no fan of modern pop, but I rather like this "Call Me Maybe" tune. I'm even more of a fan of the memes that it has spawned.

There's even an epic one for the bronies (via Chathura):

Ah, on the topic of bronies, I don't think I mentioned this on the blog earlier, but I'm now a die-hard fan of the show. It's all Gehan's fault, really. :P And before you get into insults about my masculinity: the dark ages called, and they wanted their bigots back.

And in other news, I think that certain people need to be reminded that nothing pisses me off more than people who shove their religion in my face. See, I've avoided discussing topics of faith on this little blog of mine because I absolutely loathe discussing things like that in public. Nothing is more personal than your beliefs, and I respect people who understand that. Reminds me of this awesome SatW comic:

Anyway, I'm off for now. It was good to let all of that off. Hope I can continue this. :D

Freedom of Religion - Level: Asian

CHAPTER III - FUNDAMENTAL RIGHTS

Freedom of thought, conscience and religion.

10. Every person is entitled to freedom of thought, conscience and religion, including the freedom to have or to adopt a religion or belief of his choice.

– Constitution of Sri Lanka

Most countries attempt to guarantee freedom of religion (and freedom from religion) by taking the secularist approach: clear separation of church and state and the government's non-interference in religious matters (and the church's non-interference in matters of governance). Sri Lanka, as always, has a different way of dealing with things: by giving all of the "recognized" religions a very powerful lobby in the government.

According to the "Ministries" page of the Sri Lankan government's official web portal, the following Ministries and Departments are concerned with religion:

• Ministry of Buddha Sasana and Religious Affairs
• Department of Christian Religious Affairs
• Department of Buddhist Affairs
• Department of Hindu Religious and Cultural Affairs
• Department of Muslim Religious and Cultural Affairs

Now, that's a shitload of public money being spent for the promotion and "protection" of religion. "Protection of religion" usually involves going batshit insane when a bunch of kids write a rock song that has some "religious material" in it. I wish these were the regular government departments that waste public money and blow some hot air once in a while, but hell no, they usually end up infringing on my right to live and enjoy life.

Census: Atheists aren't Sri Lankans too

Recently, the census forms were causing a commotion among Sri Lankan atheists, because you only had the choice of picking between the four (or five) major religions and another box titled "other", with no space left to write what those "other" beliefs were. This is not a big deal in itself, but it's a symptom of a much bigger issue: Sri Lanka is in denial about its growing population of atheists, agnostics and apostates; and it's refusing to give them equal recognition, protection under the law, and perhaps their own department. ;)

In Conclusion

There's nothing much to be said on this matter that isn't common sense. Government should be about managing our tax money in a responsible manner and providing the general public with basic services and security, not about telling us what to believe and when to riot over Akon or a rock song. Oh fuck, wait, I forgot I was talking about Sri Lanka there. My bad.

The government should not have any religious affiliations, and while having a Ministry of Culture is cool with me, I don't see why we need a Ministry of religious affairs and departments for each major religion. That money would be better spent on, I don't know, doing something useful like giving kids better Science education so that they can evaluate, and make an informed choice, regarding their world view and belief system.

Perhaps, in the future, the traditional picture of kids from the four religions representing the concept of Sri Lankan-ness can be modified thus:

I'm not really kidding

O Bradman, God of Cricket

Let Dilly make balls evade the stumps, as easily as he did today
Let Upul flirt with the ball, batting as gracefully as a Left-hander ever could
Let Sanga be the rock of the innings, while everything around him burns
Let Mahela continue to make me wish I batted Right-handed ;)
Let Thilan miss no more sitters!
Tell Angie to lay off the lasses, for he seems to be missing practices
Let Mali find Kenya again
And let Murali be fit, two last times!

Let the island of so many,
of so little,
plenty,
nothing,
beautiful people,
blood spilt in vain,
of the finest tea,
and the finest kasippu too,
of beaches,
and landfills,
of smiling assassins,
and frowning salesmen...

LIFT THIS CUP!

Let us be at peace with the world,
at peace with our past,
and at peace with the rocky journey ahead...

"Looking ahead with hope"
Image © Getty Images

The stages of a programming language

Every programming student is taught the four or five generations of programming languages. Well, here's a new system of categorization that some kid with too much time on his hands came up with. :D (Note that this was just done for kicks, and doesn't claim to be factually correct or anything)

Stage 1:

Assembly language

Stage 2:

C

Stage 3:

C++, Objective C, Vala

Stage 4:

Java

Stage 5:

Python? IDK really.

Why Fill T is the best rapper in Sri Lanka

Here's what his YouTube description says:

Chamath Perera better known by his stage name Fill T, is a Sri Lankan entertainer, rapper, record producer and actor. Fill T is best known as an MC in the West Coast hip hop scene, and for being one of Sri Lanka's most notable protégés. Fill T was a CMB Crip gang member while in Colombo.

To which a commenter replies:

CRIP gang member????? Aney Huththo! Panadure godey Kariya....

But YouTube comment battles aside, Fill T has produced some of the most memorable lyrics by a Sri Lankan rapper ever. This is a clip of him rapping drunk:

I've taken the clip and turned it into a few easy-to-follow strips:

oooh yeah! Edexcel Sucks!!!

That was the first title of my first post, on Thursday, February 12th, 2009. Wordpress took those first few posts down when I deleted my first blog and moved here to Blogger, thankfully. That lot is more embarrassing than all of the posts I've typed out since combined. Yes, that bad. ;)

And to answer the question that I was asked at my first blogger meetup (which also happened one year ago this month): Do I use an automated script to leave all those comments on everyone's blogs?

Yes, I do. ;P

Here's the only bit of my first post that I could save thanks to Kottu:

Well, here’s why I’m so worked up… I left school about 2 months ago, not coz I wanted to or coz I had turned 20 (have around 18 or so months before that happens), it was because of some f***tard who wouldn’t let me do what I wanted to do with my studies! And so [...]

Fiery, innit? ;)

National Day

As I type this out, the King is giving his speech on TV. All these years they showed only the guy giving the speech on TV, but now he's confined to a small picture-in-picture box, while the bigger area is being used to show all the reservoirs, roads and ports they've built. This government are masters of the spin, or atleast self-promotion, I'll give them that.

As we pass the 63rd milepost of self-rule, we're facing challenges seldom seen in our short history. Most of the world is out to get us, we've got a government that favours centralised rule and a president who abolished term limits that applied to him, we've got the armed forces engaged in business (vegetables, luxury cruise ships and even whale watching!) and we've got an opposition without hope. Even when things looked bleak for the UNP in 1975, with Sirimavo using her majority to delay elections by 2 years, there was a valiant and cunning leader in JR who capitalised on the unpopularity of the government (and its inability to feed its people... ring any bells?) and won a landslide when elections were eventually held in '77. Today the UNP is a party of blind leading the blind, and the other forces in the opposition are either in jail (SF) or getting routed from their traditional strongholds in the universities (JVP). And before you accuse me of being an anti-government booyaka who wants nothing more than to topple the bros from Hamba, let me remind you that people who want this government to succeed (myself included, I've seen way too many governments fail before) would want a strong opposition that acts as a watchdog against government wrongdoing, corruption and wastage. If we're to call this a democracy, the people at bare minimum deserve that from their elected opposition. For example, all the pundits seem to agree that had Gamini or Lalith not been assassinated, and had served as opposition leader from '93 - '99, CBK's government would never have grown so corrupt and impotent incompetent. So for the sake of the country, wake up from your slumber and get your act together, hoes. And don't complain about losing elections, you idiots don't even deserve the seats you win. Do it now or 15 years down the line, we'd all be forced to 'Walk Like an Egyptian'.

Okay then, back to watching the parade...